Dear Susan Davis: You’re Doing It Wrong

BREAKING:

At least, that’s what Susan Davis wants us to post.  After all, that’s why you send out a press release at 10:21pm on a Thursday night during a severe weather outbreak, right?  Well, I don’t want to keep you in suspense any longer – like, you know, waiting until there was an actual news cycle when people who care about this stuff would be paying attention – so I’ll let you know right now that  **makes flourish noise**

SUSAN DAVIS IS RUNNING FOR CONGRESS IN GEORGIA’S 11TH DISTRICT!!!!!11!!1!!11!!

Whew.  I couldn’t hold that in much longer.  Glad we all know now.

But wait.  Who is Susan Davis you ask?  I have no idea.  None whatsoever.  Never heard of her.  And I’ve been around here….a while.  BUT – she hasn’t.  Here’s the first part of her biography on her own press release:

Susan Davis was born in Jacksonville, Florida and was raised in Orange Park, Florida. She graduated from Orange Park High School, going on to attend Saint John’s College and FCCJ, majoring in Culinary Arts and Elementary Education.

If there is one thing I know about Georgia’s 11th district voters, they are derned tired of all these folks who were born, raised, and educated in Georgia representing them in Congress.  I, for one, have been waiting for someone, almost anyone*, from the only state that Fark.com has dedicated a tag to: Florida.  Heck, at least she learned to cook proper while she was there.  I hope and pray she starts her campaign by telling us we do our barbecue all wrong.  Perhaps she can suggest a proper mustard sauce.

She calls herself “The only good choice for Georgia’s 11th Congressional District”.  Let it be known that having a great choice is too much to ask for.

She says “Susan Davis is not a career politician, and she’s not looking for a promotion.”  I for one, always look for someone who doesn’t want to wait around wasting time learning the business before getting promoted.  I find putting someone without any experience (except culinary school, of course) straight into the executive suite.

There are other parts of the press release that are…unconventional.

But most interesting to me as an 11th district voter that has never before 10:21 PM tonight heard of Susan Davis is that despite her announcement for Congress, she doesn’t bother to tell me in her announcement what party she intends to seek Congress from.

Her entire, unedited press release appears below, but I will use this as a good time to explain that this is a political blog catering to the inside baseball crowd of Georgia politics.  We’re not going to insult our readers’ intelligence by pretending every candidate that sends us an announcement has an equal chance of winning.  Bob Barr?  Sure, it’s a longshot and his choice of consultant is terminal to his cause, but (cue the theme from Dumb and Dumber) I’m saying there’s a chance.

Susan Davis – save your qualifying fee.  Please.  Politics is a cruel business, and if you don’t like what you’re reading here, you really, really won’t like what you’re going to experience during the retail part of this campaign.

*almost anyone.  Except Allen West.  Despite the fact that the Chairman of Georgia’s GOP said she wanted him to run for Congress from Georgia, most of us who were on our meds found that to be a horrible, horrible idea.

The press release follows:

Press Release
Restore the People’s Voice”
 
For Immediate Release:
 
The only good choice for Georgia’s 11th Congressional District is Susan Davis.
  • Susan Davis is  not a career politician, and she’s not looking for a promotion.
  • She is a reformer.
  • She believes the States can better make decisions on education than the Federal Government.
  • She seeks to prioritize federal spending on medical research to better emphasize finding cures for childhood cancers.
  • She is committed to being a citizen legislator. She understands that Washington cannot be reformed solely from within or without, but must be met head-on from both angles.
  • She believes in Constitutional limitation of Government; she believes in Constitutional liberty and the Second Amendment.
  • She believes principles should never be compromised.

Susan Davis was born in Jacksonville, Florida and was raised in Orange Park, Florida. She graduated from Orange Park High School, going on to attend Saint John’s College and FCCJ, majoring in Culinary Arts and Elementary Education.

She has first-hand knowledge of the courage and responsibility necessary to survive sexual assault. Having three children, and being very active in childhood cancer causes, she wishes more people were outspoken on this issue. She comes from a military family and understands the soldier’s personal and family sacrifices. She is an active member of St. Joseph Catholic Church in Marietta GA

Susan stands for a citizen legislature and a return to a self-rule government. She is the only good choice for Congress in GA’s 11th District. Restore the People’s voice and vote for Susan Davis.

25 comments

  1. George Chidi says:

    To add to the amusement: there is currently a Susan Davis serving in Congress. The (actual) Congresswoman Susan Carol Alpert Davis is a classic New Democrat from San Diego, a military spouse and former social worker. This, of course, makes some of the typical online background research into “our” Ms. Susan Maechell Davis of Kennesaw a little more difficult.

    But the Kennesaw version isn’t terribly hard to figure out, regardless. The physical address listed for her website was purchased out of foreclosure last year for under $100-grand. She has virtually no web history — no postings, blogs, or even a meaningful paper trail. The website itself is grammatically special and not terribly professional. If she’s ever contributed financially to a political campaign, it was below reporting threshholds, and she doesn’t show up in a quick screen of Republican Party stuff … except that two people who live in Kennesaw wrote her name in for the GA-11 seat in the general election last year.

    This is normal.

    Unless your parents dragged you to campaign rallies when you were a kid, people’s first introduction to politics is often enough a weird burst of seeming overreach. I’ve been there. Most years, there will be one or two folks with bees in their pants to make a run like this. Frankly, I think it should happen more often, particularly in uncontested primaries and uncontested general elections. It’s a learning experience for folks to watch — it helps to demonstrate why so many experienced political types do things that seem soul-crushing or counterproductive or un-spontaneous. And, perhaps, something interesting might be gleaned for the rest of us from the experiment. I only hope Davis knows to keep her personal costs low and to mind the FEC rules carefully.

    So, lesson one: Ma’am … late night press releases are a no-no. The assignment editors at the TV stations are gone by seven; copy desks close at the papers around 10:30. A blogger posting about your “announcement” (and, bear in mind, your FEC filings have been visible for a little while now online) at 12:30 on a Friday morning is an invitation to snark.

  2. A. Helios says:

    This blog entry is the most sexist thing I’ve ever read on this page, and it certainly reinforces why establishment GOP is toxic to the political process. You’re willing to humiliate a woman who has courage enough to announce her campaign and commitment to principles, but you’ll defend career politicians?

    This is why the GOP can’t have nice things.

    • Charlie says:

      No, the GOP can’t have nice things because we have too many people that want to take power away from an entrenched system, have absolutely not prepared themselves to do so, then flail themselves at said system or behind an unprepared flailing candidate – and then everyone wonders why nothing ever changes.

      Politics ain’t beanbag, and Ms. Davis and her supporters need to understand that she wants to take power away from people who will fight very hard, and be much more mean and underhanded than my very straightforward response to this ridiculous press release.

      It’s not going to get easier. Don’t blame me for not being prepared for what you’re entering.

  3. NorthGeorgiaGirl says:

    That was a fun read. My favorite part is, “She has first-hand knowledge of the courage and responsibility necessary to survive sexual assault. Having three children, and being very active in childhood cancer causes, she wishes more people were outspoken on this issue.” Weird issues to throw together.

    Maybe I should run…sounds like fun. I can write a better press release than that, and I’m sure I can find some money and time I’m willing to waste on a lost cause.

    Never mind, I’m really hoping to see Mr. L-l-o-p CPA get back in the race. He still has signs around, so he’s already ahead of the other folks in the race.

    • JayJacket says:

      I personally hope that Mr. Opitz runs again. He’s on the verge of setting a record for most runs without cracking just 10 percent of the vote (up to 6, I believe) and if he actually gets more than 10 percent we get an excuse to whip out the tin foil party hats.

      There’s some crazy people in the 11th. Susan Davis doesn’t sound like one of them, but I hope a few get in just to make the debates interesting.

      • NorthGeorgiaGirl says:

        That’s why I hope Llop runs again. I saw a video of an exchange between him and Opitz in a debate last time where he said Woodrow Wilson was president during the Depression and he appeared to think he had hit a home run with his “zinger” to Opitz.

        I heard Opitz might run for Senate instead. Either way, it will make for some entertainment for those of us warped enough to watch debates.

  4. Spacey G says:

    “A weird burst of seeming overreach.” And then there are plenty who are too stupid to conduct their neighborhood association meeting.

  5. Spacey G says:

    Speaking of those bursts of overreach… why are you wasting your many word powers on Peach Pundit, George? “Between clients” as they say?

  6. ricstewart says:

    Let’s take a moment to celebrate trailblazers like Beth Merkelson, who made it possible for people like Susan Davis.

  7. Christopher says:

    “She has first-hand knowledge of the courage and responsibility necessary to survive sexual assault.”

    Is she implying that being a rape victim will make her a better legislator or does she think that sexual assault is part of the congressional election process?

    She does realize that Bill Clinton is no longer in office, right?

  8. Personally, I’d rather hear more about public policy on childhood cancer and sexual assault than about who hates gays and brown people more. Even though the latter, of course, is what gets you elected in Georgia.

  9. DTK says:

    Oh man, that Susan Davis is such a dimwit. How could she start her campaign this way? Everybody knows you’re supposed to issue a kickoff campaign release highlighting that searing issue of reapportionment. That’s what the voters want to hear! …

    Charlie, you’ve been a bit pissy lately and there’s no reason to pick on this poor lady like this. You’re not Hassinger. Especially since your misguided foray into politics wound up the way it did. You should go read some of your campaign’s materials At least Ms. Davis has the chance to drop out before being humiliated with a last place finish.

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