Democrats Commit Crimes Against the South

As you may know, I was born in the south. I was born in Georgia and I was born in Atlanta at Grady Memorial Hospital. So, as you can see, I’m part of the Georgia trifecta; native southerner, native Georgian, and native Atlantan.

I’m very proud of that and I’m also very proud of the cuisine that is part of southern culture. I’m talking about the hot buttered biscuits, the cornbread, the fried okra, the mac & cheese, the peach cobbler, the grits, and oh yes, the fried chicken – fried chicken so good that you want to court-martial the colonel and tell Church’s to go to hell.

So you can understand why I’m very distressed to know that there won’t be any southern cuisine at the Denver Democratic National Convention.

As part of the effort to make the 2008 national convention the greenest ever, the Democrats’ catering guidelines include one that strikes at the heart of Southern cuisine: No fried food.

No fried chicken. No fried catfish. No fried green tomatoes. No fried okra. No fried anything.

Source: 6/26/2008 AJC article “Southern shocker: No fried food at Democratic convention”

Yes, you read that right.

Those liberal, commie wackos out in Denver want us to southern Democrats to eat healthy. Well, let me tell you, if I wanted to eat healthy I’d cut back on my daily breakfast of a dozen eggs and a loaf of toast (no, I don’t really eat that much. I just heard Redd Foxx use that line on a episode of “Sanford & Son” and it always cracks me up.).

I’ve got a strong inclination to go out to Denver with a couple of hot plates, a bag of chicken legs (on sale this week at Kroger for 99 cents a pound), fry up some chicken and see which line is longer…

…The line for the rabbit food?

Or the line for the real, southern food?


  1. BigSteamingPileOfShawn says:

    Speaking of crimes against the south, I just got Charlice Byrd’s latest campaign mail piece. In it she has the audacity to include a photo of herself with what must be 150 to 200 children behind her standing on the marble steps in the entry foyer of what I assume is her palatial mansion. This is clearly an attempt to make us think that all of those children are her kids.

    Who the hell does she think she is?

    Beyond that, the piece blatantly displays sets of teeth, gums, and jaws that appear to have been viciously ripped out of the mouths of her political opponents. This kind of unabashed display of her violent oppression of free speech is reminiscent of Idi Amin’s human rights abuses and political repression in Uganda back in the 1970’s. She’s obviously a demonic megalomaniac who must be stopped.

    What’s more, last night as the aliens, who routinely abduct Gina Carr and me, were probing our various cavities with their extraterrestrial utensils, I overheard them talking about reprogramming all of the voting machines to make sure that Byrd wins!

    After being released I immediately filed a full report with the Cherokee County Sherriff’s Department. Everyone should be able to use open records requests to get copies of it for display as iron-clad, irrefutable evidence (because if it’s in a police report it must be true) of Byrd’s sinister and evil plot to take over the planet, kill all of the trees, and harvest our brains for food.

    Text “PEACE”.


  2. Andre Walker says:

    Well, DecaturGuy, for the record I’m 5’8 and have run 6 consecutive Peachtree Road Races in about an hour and twenty-five minutes each time. I highly doubt that if I weighed 400 pounds, as you claim, I’d be able to walk a half mile let alone run 6 miles without A.) passing out or B.) running out of breath. The fact is that for the last five years, I’ve run the Peachtree and then remained on my feet for another 3 hours as a volunteer for the Salute 2 America parade.

  3. Howard Roark says:

    No doubt the democrat party is made up of fruits and nuts. When Herman Talmadge was Senator he always had a fishing trip scheduled during the convention. He would not associate with the delegates and national leaders in the party.

  4. voice of reason says:

    How can they serve that food at their convention and then turn around and put the sin tax they’re foaming at the mouth to put on all our junk food once they’re in charge of all 3 branches???

    They’re just looking down the road folks… stock up on your lard now!

  5. reedja says:

    Boy, You Georgians really are stupid. no wonder you all are second to last, because you sit around and discuss stuff like this. Now, did you all ride to library in your tractors to discuss this online.

  6. Howard Roark says:


    People ride on tractors so foolish people like you have something to eat. You probably believe food comes from Kroger and cotton from an aspirin bottle.

    I just have to ask, second to last in what? Your post was somewhat incomplete.

  7. reedja says:

    Second to last in education. I thought that was implied. I am not foolish either. i am just pointing the idiocy in Georgia. You all elect idiots like “Sonny” Perdue and Casey Cagle, and Cagle has to be one of the worst public speakers I have heard with McCain being the first.

  8. jsm says:

    Doesn’t Denver have KFC? Popeye’s? Church’s? What’s the big deal? I wouldn’t want to be eating the high-fallutin grub the convention folks were serving anyway. I’ll bet some street vendors will be doing some pretty good sales, too.

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