Nancy Schaefer is too funny

Nancy Schaefer sent out what is probably the worst political fundraising letter I have ever received. She goes three quarters of the first page before even asking for money. But, along the way, we learn that “Paul Broun has a sordid past that colors his present and his future. Barry Fleming, a liberal Republican trial lawyer, is also a candidate.”

You can just envision her at the foot of her bed, on her knees, in her flannel night gown, praying, “Jesus forgive me for what I know of that man, Mr. Broun. Surely the fires of hell will be quick to consume him. And Lord spare me your wrath, but feel free to go after Barry Fleming.”

Schaefer also says she “can serve [her] constituents with honesty, integrity, and dignity.” She left out “with skill and energy.”

Now, for those of you who are thinking of giving her money, you should consider this. She writes, “I am trusting that the statistics we have that suggest a successful campaign will prove true.” I nearly spit my coffee out at that.

You too can have your laugh of the day by checking out the letter here.
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5 comments

  1. Groseclose says:

    “. . . and I can promote individual liberty, limited government, lower taxes, jobs, no amnesty under any circumstances, secured borders, and hopefully an opportunity set our children and families free from the clutches of Child Protective Services and DFCS.”

    In this quote, you have this litany of these big, generally Republican ideas, and then, BOOM, out of nowhere comes this issue with Child Protective Services. And since when was child protection a federal role for Government? It is not, nor should it be an issue for Congress! Federalism, Sen. Schaefer? That whole comment is completely contradictory to her previous claimed allegiance to limited government; presumably she did mean limited FEDERAL government, being she was seeking a federal position.

    Honestly, this is my first impression of Nancy Schaefer. But, I now know she is not going to get my vote.

  2. bowersville says:

    “I am trusting that the statistics…” will show my senator will turn into a pumpkin at midnight tonight.

  3. Holly says:

    Would you mind pasting the text of the letter, Erick (or anyone)? For some reason, I only see dots where writing should be on the PDF.

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