How Dare The Citizens Object To Their City Council!!!!

Residents of Lilburn have dared to object to Mayor Torquemada and the City Council’s un-American, anti-fun legislation banning pool tables, karaoke, and trivia contests in places that sell alcohol.

Someone should bulldoze City Hall and put a bar there, with a pool table and bad karaoke.

I hear that next they will insist that all school girls wear chastity belts until the age of 25 and any person that does not say “please” or “thank you” will be flogged by Mayor Torquemada on the public square at high noon each Wednesday.

Oh, and no non-Christians are allowed to live in Lilburn either. You just aren’t welcome. If you drink, sing badly, or worship any deity other than Christ, or are atheist, you absolutely, 100% cannot ever live in Lilburn. The City Council will round you up and kill you.

That’s just the way they are.

By the way, I’m assigned negative tags to this post, so if anyone ever googles Lilburn or does a technorati search, they’ll see what an unpleasant place it is and stay the heck away from it.

Technorati Tags: Lilburn sucks, Lilburn, GA, Lilburn Hates You

9 comments

  1. adamsmith4883 says:

    Um, what are they going to do with the Capitol interns who are staying there during session? I believe there are several…

  2. dingleberry says:

    If you drink, sing badly, or worship any deity other than Christ, or are atheist, you absolutely, 100% cannot ever live in Lilburn…

    You also can’t call yourself “conservative” by today’s definition…

  3. DavidAtlanta says:

    I just don’t understand why karaoke is illegal in Lilburn. What’s wrong with adults going to bars and doing embarrassing things like pretending that they can actually sing?

    As I understand it, Lilburn doesn’t even allow pool tables or darts in bars.

    What is the justification for these laws? Someone needs to remind Lilburn that they are in the United States, not Saudia Arabia.

  4. R.E.M. says:

    Why not just let the county annex Lilburn? At least the people can have less of a tax burden and still sing karaoke while drinking a beer.

    I swear, you would think Sadie Fields is pulling the strings of the Lilburn city electeds!

  5. Demonbeck says:

    This is an excellent opportunity for the Libertarian Party to gain some influence in Georgia.

    Where’s Jase? Is he practicing his karaoke?

  6. joe says:

    We’ve got Trouble right here in Lilburn City, and that starts with T and that rhymes with P, and that stands for Pool…

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